One Month!

Our Dean is one month old today! Here are a few things about him.

• He sleeps a lot!
• He usually wakes up twice a night (sometimes three times...) but then goes right back to sleep after I feed him. Good boy. :)
• He likes being swaddled. He sleeps that way at night but we leave him free during the day.
• He stays asleep when we put him down!
• We can leave him for awhile without paying attention to him and he stays happy. He usually only gets mad when he's hungry.
• He's already been stepped on (by accident) and knelt on (not so much an accident...) by his big brother. He's also had toys stacked on him a few times, too. Don't worry, they were soft and/or light toys and Mom removed them quickly.
• He is just SO chill.
• He's starting to like his swing (when Brennen isn't trying to push it faster for him).
• He likes baths but doesn't like being dried off.
• The only thing he really doesn't like is tummy time.
• He's such a good eater! He'll usually eat quickly (it takes me about 20 minutes total) every 2-4 hours. We do supplement him a little but so far not more than 2 ounces a day. He's getting to be a little chunk and I bet he weighs like 9 pounds already (he was 7 lbs 12 oz almost three weeks ago).
• Brennen really loves him and so do we!

I just can't imagine life without him! I remember being upset the night before he was born because I felt like I was losing my little baby (Brennen). And that first week I felt guilty when I couldn't give Brennen the attention he was used to or when he'd cry for me and I couldn't be there for him right away. But we fell into a routine really quickly and I feel so much love for both of these little boys and I hardly remember what life was like a month ago. Even though some days are hard I LOVE being a mother! It is the greatest blessing that my Heavenly Father has given me. I haven't felt any depression this time around and it's wonderful! I just feel happy and most of the time I feel like I know what I'm doing. :)
Now for a few pictures of the boys.
Mom and Dean.

 Handsome Brennen.

 Dean is this chill and calm almost all the time! And check out how long Brennen's eyelashes are.

 Brennen sharing his puzzles...

 Cute, sleeping baby.

 Brotherly love. <3

 More sleeping. His Grandma Hope made the beautiful afghan on top of him.

 A hint of a smile. :)

Easter and a Dean update

We had a wonderful Easter this year. On Friday night we went to Grandma and Grandpa's to dye eggs and Brennen loved it! He became just as colored as the eggs but he didn't seem to mind and was really into it. He says and does so many funny things. We just love him!

Easter Sunday was stake conference so we went to that and it was Dean's first time going to church. He had a cute outfit but it was a tad too big for him... He and Brennen looked pretty cute before church, though.

We did a little egg hunt just here at home with Brennen. I kind of wish we would have done more outside somewhere but it was still fun to watch him find his eggs. He also learned a new word... "candy!" As for Dean, his first Easter was pretty uneventful. He slept a lot and behaved very well as he usually does.

Matt and I have decided that there is no Easter Bunny in our house but that our kids can still find eggs, they'll just know we were the ones who hid them. I had the Easter Bunny growing up and I enjoyed getting small gifts but we just decided we really want to focus on the Savior in our family. I've always loved Easter but now as an adult I can really appreciate what it really means and I'm thankful that I had the day to reflect on the Savior and it was fun to try to explain to Brennen what Easter really means.
I took Dean to the doctor yesterday for his two week check-up! As I was sitting in the room waiting for the doctor, watching Brennen play and holding an awake and very content Dean, it hit me that I am a mother of two! How the devil did that happen?! ha ha! But the doctor was very impressed with Dean's calm nature and he didn't even flinch until they did the heal poke. Here are the stats:
Weight: 7 lbs 12 oz!
Length: 20 1/4 inches (we suspect that whoever measured him at birth at the hospital measured him too short... 18 1/2 seems a little low...)
Head: 36.4 cm
Just for a little comparrison, at the same age Brennen was 7 lbs 3 oz (he was born 7 lbs 5 oz), 21 1/4 inches, and 36.4 cm for his head! So the same as Dean but I swear Brennen's head was bigger... guess not. :)
Here's Dean in his carseat. His hand position cracks me up. :)

And this is just one of our little family of four on Easter Sunday.

Baby Dean!

Dean Tanner Clark was born on Tuesday March 27, 2012 at 12:01 PM! He weighed in at 6 pounds 15 ounces and was 18 1/2 inches long.
Like with Brennen, the doctors thought that the baby wasn't growing. I measured 36 weeks several weeks in a row and in both growth ultrasounds, two weeks apart, the baby measured exactly the same. So on Monday the 26th Dr. Bragg scheduled me for an induction for 5:30 AM on Tuesday the 27th with Dr. Klingler.
They gave me pitocin at about 6:45 AM and Dr. Klingler broke my water at about 8:30. The contractions instantly got WAY more intense. Matt and I walked the halls for awhile but then I couldn’t handle it anymore and asked for IV drugs at about 10:45. They helped…. for the first few contractions. Then they got way intense again and I honestly feel like they were a lot more powerful than they were with Brennen. They checked my cervix at 11 and I was at a 7 but I still asked for the epidural. The epidural kicked in at about 11:30 and Dean was born at noon!
I was SO bummed that I got the epidural because I didn’t with Brennen and his labor was twice as long. Plus I would have only had to endure another half hour but I thought it would be as long as it was with Brennen so I got it. It was SO AWESOME to get that pain relief but I kind of felt like a failure that I got it.
Dean is a very happy, content little baby. He is basically the opposite of his big brother ha ha! I felt overwhelmed and depressed after I had Brennen but right now I just feel really blissfully happy (even though I only get a few hours of sleep every night). :)
Brennen loves his little brother and calls him “Baby Dean.” He also narrates everything he’s doing. “Baby Dean crying. Baby Dean sleeping. Baby Dean eating.” It’s cute. And today I took both kids to the store by myself for the first time and I planned on taking two trips out to the car because Brennen isn’t very good at going down the stairs but when I went to leave without the baby Brennen started crying out, “Baby Dean! Bring Baby Dean!”
Here are some pictures!

Ah, Life.

Less than a week until D-Day! I went to the doc this morning and he said I was dilated 1 cm..... how can that be when a different doc said I was 1.5 at 32 weeks (which was 7 weeks ago...) and another different doc last week measured me at just under 3 cm? I'm very confused... oh well. I'll just say I'm around.... 2 cm? :)
I finally accepted the fact today (after some tears and more worries) that everything WILL be ok. I've been stressing so much that the baby will come while Matt is in a test but I realized today that there's nothing I can do about it if that happens and that we'll take things as they come. And I've been stressing out about how life is going to work with two kids and a husband who will still be very busy in school for anther year and a half. But, like I said, things WILL be ok and I know I can do it and I need to not worry about the future and/or things I cannot control. I don't actually WANT the baby to come early, I just want him to come when it's most convenient for me! ha ha I know he'll come when he's ready and I really just want him to arrive safely and for him to be healthy!
My husband pointed out today that I've been being negative and feeling sorry for myself (he did it in a loving way) and I realized he's right. Not just about my impatience to have the baby but about everything. So I made a decision today that I need to have a better attitude and somehow get my mind off having the baby because it's driving me crazy. I actually like being pregnant and I know I need to enjoy the last week or so. I need to be patient and happy no matter what my circumstances are.
Here I am at 39 weeks!

On a side note, does anyone who is reading this use Window's Live Writer? I've been doing all of my posts from there (WAY easier and faster for uploading pictures) but all of a sudden it won't work for me... I'll finish a post but then it won't publish. If anyone has a clue let me know... :)

Pharmacy Rotations!

Last week Matt got his rotation schedule for next year! I guess it's next year, but really he starts in May so it's almost upon us. Each rotation is 4 weeks long and he does 9 of them during the year with one rotation off and a 7 week break over Thanksgiving and Christmas. We're really excited that we know where he's going but I'm a little bit bummed that we won't have our own home for a whole year. We're going to move in with Matt's parents which is a huge blessing so that will be our home base and then there are a few places where the kids and I will be able to go and live with Matt. It will be hard to be a nomad with two little kids but we're very grateful that we'll have places to stay with different members of Matt's family.
So here's where he'll be!

• Omaha, NE
• Basin, WY
• Thayne, WY
• Laramie (for two different rotations)
• Longmont, CO
• Powell, WY
• Cheyenne, WY (this is really one rotation but lasts twice as long so 8 weeks instead of 4)

Hopefully the kids and I will be able to go with Matt when he goes to Basin, Thayne, and Powell because he has family in those areas that we're hoping we'll be able to stay with. He's hoping to live with a friend while he's in Longmont who has that same rotation and then he'll come home on weekends. When he's in Omaha he'll stay there the whole 4 weeks and I probably won't see him that entire time which will be hard but it's the only one where I won't see him at least on weekends so it could be worse!
As for the baby, I went to the doctor yesterday and in two weeks I progressed exactly zero. :( I'm still about 50% effaced and not quite 3cm. I really wanted to have the baby this week to avoid Matt's many tests that he has in the next couple weeks but it's not going to happen. I'm stressing myself out about it because he CANNOT miss these tests and he has to do well on them in order to pass this semester. Yikes! I just keep praying that the baby will come on a day when Matt will be able to be there with me the whole time and that he'll be able to have enough time to study.
The future is kind of freaking me out at the moment but at the same time it's really exciting and there are a lot of changes coming our way!
A picture of Brennen for good measure. :) He was "reading" my book.